I would really love to know why I didn't make this happen sooner.
This morning, I took Ms. Mare to the indoor for a little in-hand work, to refresh her manners before Casey came out to work with us tonight. I asked her to halt, standing square, facing away from the door we came in through. Apparently, if we were to in fact halt without one eye on said doorway, dragons would come bursting out of it.
It took 20 minutes for me to get her mind to follow her into the indoor, and another 10 after that to actually get the square halt I was looking for.
It shouldn't have been that hard to get her attention.
I'm a bad momma, not working her like I should.
But this is why I need help, right?
This evening was (both literally and figuratively) like comparing night and day. Sure, Ms. Mare broke out the attitude. We started with some work on the longe line, and Ms. Mare showed off most of her evasions to being asked to actually work politely. For the record, she's not bad- she's just naughty. Instead of carrying herself, she tends to arch her neck and do a decent imitation of being in frame- until you see the hollow back and her hind end just kind of dragging all over the place. Or she'll step under herself, and stick her nose up in a great giraffe imitation. And if you get really firm about it and ask for both ends to be engaged at the same time... she'll turn to the inside and all of a sudden your longe line is slack and you can't really ask for collection anymore and it all goes to heck in a handbasket.
So we worked on it. We worked on praising for using her hind end and front end and back ALL AT THE SAME TIME, without worrying about the shape of the circle we were working on. We worked on picking up her nose when she goes to drop it too low, and adding energy to the hind end when it starts dragging. We got to do something different when we got 5 (five!) good strides in a row. We never did get them at the canter, but she's a little unbalanced for that still, so we settled for maintaining the canter for 3 laps.
And then I got on. And I tell you, it was amazing. For the first time in a VERY long time, I felt like Ms. Mare and I were connected again. This was the horse that I used to ride, when she was three and we'd do SOMETHING together every day- in hand work, a trail ride, light schooling- whatever! I was ready to cry just from the relief of it. On Sunday, I'll confess, I said unforgivable words. I asked Toro why I kept her, if she wasn't a horse I enjoyed riding. I asked him why I didn't just sell Ms. Mare, and content myself with horses I actually liked. Last night's ride- even though all we did was walk to cool out, and some turns on the forehand to keep the corners interesting- reminded me of how much I really love this mare, and how much I think we can do together.
I should have asked for this years ago.
Tuesday, April 23, 2013
Monday, April 22, 2013
Asking for help
For the longest time, I've been convinced that if I couldn't train this beautiful, talented, sweet mare to be a fun riding horse, I had no business riding. After all, I'm a fairly decent rider and she's a smartypants, so between the two of us we should be able to figure it out, right? And of course, if we can't, it's my fault!
I've recently become convinced that I'm an idiot.
Just because I know how to ride a horse that's already been taught the basic aids doesn't mean I know a darn thing about teaching Ms. Mare what I mean when I do X-Y-Z. I haven't gotten to where I am without help, so there is NO SHAME in asking for more.
Sadly, I get so wrapped up in my own mind that finding the right kind of help- the kind the is actually helpful- is very challenging. It's easy to find people that can ride well. It's easy to find people that get results from their teaching. It's hard for me to find someone that can ride well and can teach ME. My stubborn streak and flairs of anxiety make for an interesting combination, to say the least.
Enter Casey.
I met Casey when I was working at the farm where I bought Ms. Mare several years ago. That's the same farm where I learned what little I know about starting horses, and where Casey had been working for years. I left the farm about 10 months after buying Ms. Mare, but Casey and I have stayed close friends. Casey will tell you she doesn't know much about training. She'll tell you she's not good at cantering, that she doesn't even know how to jump, and that she's never taught lessons before.
Casey is EXACTLY what I need.
See, Casey understands two very important things- me and Ms. Mare. Ms Mare is, in fact, quite a bit like Casey's own WonderPony, which is a major added bonus. I like the WonderPony. She's a fun ride, game for anything, and so full of try it just breaks your heart if she can't accomplish something. That's the kind of ride I want Ms. Mare to be, but we're so scatterbrained at the moment that when she looks to me for guidance, I totally lose my cool and we both just melt down into a mane-tossing, eyes-streaming mess. Does that sound like fun? Yeah, I don't think so either.
So, I did the smart thing. I talked to Casey, who is having a rather challenging time with her animals at the moment (we'll talk about the WonderPony and her mysterious lameness some other time), and is lacking a mount she can work with. Casey is a teacher at heart- she enjoys the art of explaining what needs to be done in a way that the pupil (in this case, Ms. Mare) can understand. So she's going to come explain the facts of being a good riding horse to Ms. Mare a couple times a week, and she's going to come out a third time a week to explain to me and Ms. Mare how to make our partnership work, or show me what they've been working on, or some combination of the above. I'm going to get a mare that understands my garbled attempts at speaking equine, Ms. Mare is going to get a personalized and private education, and Casey gets ponytime on a horse that she enjoys working with.
I'm excited to find out how much of an idiot I've been.
I've recently become convinced that I'm an idiot.
Just because I know how to ride a horse that's already been taught the basic aids doesn't mean I know a darn thing about teaching Ms. Mare what I mean when I do X-Y-Z. I haven't gotten to where I am without help, so there is NO SHAME in asking for more.
Sadly, I get so wrapped up in my own mind that finding the right kind of help- the kind the is actually helpful- is very challenging. It's easy to find people that can ride well. It's easy to find people that get results from their teaching. It's hard for me to find someone that can ride well and can teach ME. My stubborn streak and flairs of anxiety make for an interesting combination, to say the least.
Enter Casey.
I met Casey when I was working at the farm where I bought Ms. Mare several years ago. That's the same farm where I learned what little I know about starting horses, and where Casey had been working for years. I left the farm about 10 months after buying Ms. Mare, but Casey and I have stayed close friends. Casey will tell you she doesn't know much about training. She'll tell you she's not good at cantering, that she doesn't even know how to jump, and that she's never taught lessons before.
Casey is EXACTLY what I need.
See, Casey understands two very important things- me and Ms. Mare. Ms Mare is, in fact, quite a bit like Casey's own WonderPony, which is a major added bonus. I like the WonderPony. She's a fun ride, game for anything, and so full of try it just breaks your heart if she can't accomplish something. That's the kind of ride I want Ms. Mare to be, but we're so scatterbrained at the moment that when she looks to me for guidance, I totally lose my cool and we both just melt down into a mane-tossing, eyes-streaming mess. Does that sound like fun? Yeah, I don't think so either.
So, I did the smart thing. I talked to Casey, who is having a rather challenging time with her animals at the moment (we'll talk about the WonderPony and her mysterious lameness some other time), and is lacking a mount she can work with. Casey is a teacher at heart- she enjoys the art of explaining what needs to be done in a way that the pupil (in this case, Ms. Mare) can understand. So she's going to come explain the facts of being a good riding horse to Ms. Mare a couple times a week, and she's going to come out a third time a week to explain to me and Ms. Mare how to make our partnership work, or show me what they've been working on, or some combination of the above. I'm going to get a mare that understands my garbled attempts at speaking equine, Ms. Mare is going to get a personalized and private education, and Casey gets ponytime on a horse that she enjoys working with.
I'm excited to find out how much of an idiot I've been.
Sunday, April 21, 2013
A Fresh Start
Everyone knows horse people are crazy. That's the real reason parents pray so fervently that "it's just a phase" and "s/he'll grow out of it." As a horse person myself, I have to concede the truth- I'm a little crazy too.
Which is how I found myself on my (relatively green) (6 year old) mare (for the first time in months) (at a horse show (for the first time in 3 years)). Add in the parenthetical statements one at a time, and you go from "fairly reasonable" to "bordering insane" pretty quickly.
The good, the bad, and theugly fantastic
The bad news is we have a lot of work to do. This isn't actually news in any sense of the word, and is in fact part of the reason we went to a show at all- to give ourselves a starting point. So far, we've determined that months off and a busy show environment don't mix, even if the class we chose was well within our comfort zone. The first class (English Pleasure Walk/Trot Warm up) was PACKED with people warming up for all of the English Pleasure classes. Ms. Mare spent the entire class tossing her forelock from one eye to the other, which made for an unpleasant walk and an impossible trot. Note to self- pull mane and braid before the next show. She also had a very itchy bridle path and was rubbing her head on ANYONE who stood next to her, so I'm going to be looking for a bridle that is padded or a single piece or both.
The good news is we didn't die or make a total spectacle of ourselves. Of all the onlookers, only a couple that know us well could tell it wasn't going well out in the ring. Of course, for me it felt like the end of the world, but apparently we make the end of the world look okayish. The other good news is that we managed to find workable attire for the show- who knew that 3 years ago, I was 2 sizes smaller? I found breeches that were too big the last time I wore them that fit perfectly, picked up a new jacket at a tent sale the morning of the show, and managed to jam my calves into my boots for one last go-round- suffice to say, this was their last show with me.
The great news is we actually placed! We brought home a very pretty (and undeserved, I'm sure) pink 5th place ribbon out of 7 entrants for our Adult Novice Walk/Trot class. We tucked in our forelock, which dramatically decreased the head-shaking, and had a much smaller class, and it went so much better.
So,what are we going to do about it?
Once upon a time, I could decide to go to a show, load Ms. Mare, go, and do well. I'd like to get back to that point, but I recognize that involves going to lots and lots of shows, and I'm not sure I have the financing for that just yet. But we'll see. I figure it's more reasonable to start with a week, a month, and a year goals, and add as needed.
This week's goal:
Get back in the saddle, so to speak. Interact with Ms Mare every day (more than feeding and turn-out/turn-in). Longe, ride, work in hand- something!
This month's goal:
Find our gaits- walking and trotting under saddle for sure, straight and balanced. Correct canter on the longe line, at least- we'll figure it out under saddle in May.
This year's goal:
My goal for the year is less about Ms. Mare, and more about me. I want to find my confidence again. On a certain other black mare, I would happily go cantering through the woods, jumping anything in our way and having a BLAST. On Ms. Mare, she shakes her head and I fall apart. I have no idea why. I want to stop feeling that insecure, because it's definitely going to negatively affect her and nobody needs to be this level of neurotic.
Which is how I found myself on my (relatively green) (6 year old) mare (for the first time in months) (at a horse show (for the first time in 3 years)). Add in the parenthetical statements one at a time, and you go from "fairly reasonable" to "bordering insane" pretty quickly.
The good, the bad, and the
The bad news is we have a lot of work to do. This isn't actually news in any sense of the word, and is in fact part of the reason we went to a show at all- to give ourselves a starting point. So far, we've determined that months off and a busy show environment don't mix, even if the class we chose was well within our comfort zone. The first class (English Pleasure Walk/Trot Warm up) was PACKED with people warming up for all of the English Pleasure classes. Ms. Mare spent the entire class tossing her forelock from one eye to the other, which made for an unpleasant walk and an impossible trot. Note to self- pull mane and braid before the next show. She also had a very itchy bridle path and was rubbing her head on ANYONE who stood next to her, so I'm going to be looking for a bridle that is padded or a single piece or both.
The good news is we didn't die or make a total spectacle of ourselves. Of all the onlookers, only a couple that know us well could tell it wasn't going well out in the ring. Of course, for me it felt like the end of the world, but apparently we make the end of the world look okayish. The other good news is that we managed to find workable attire for the show- who knew that 3 years ago, I was 2 sizes smaller? I found breeches that were too big the last time I wore them that fit perfectly, picked up a new jacket at a tent sale the morning of the show, and managed to jam my calves into my boots for one last go-round- suffice to say, this was their last show with me.
The great news is we actually placed! We brought home a very pretty (and undeserved, I'm sure) pink 5th place ribbon out of 7 entrants for our Adult Novice Walk/Trot class. We tucked in our forelock, which dramatically decreased the head-shaking, and had a much smaller class, and it went so much better.
So,what are we going to do about it?
Once upon a time, I could decide to go to a show, load Ms. Mare, go, and do well. I'd like to get back to that point, but I recognize that involves going to lots and lots of shows, and I'm not sure I have the financing for that just yet. But we'll see. I figure it's more reasonable to start with a week, a month, and a year goals, and add as needed.
This week's goal:
Get back in the saddle, so to speak. Interact with Ms Mare every day (more than feeding and turn-out/turn-in). Longe, ride, work in hand- something!
This month's goal:
Find our gaits- walking and trotting under saddle for sure, straight and balanced. Correct canter on the longe line, at least- we'll figure it out under saddle in May.
This year's goal:
My goal for the year is less about Ms. Mare, and more about me. I want to find my confidence again. On a certain other black mare, I would happily go cantering through the woods, jumping anything in our way and having a BLAST. On Ms. Mare, she shakes her head and I fall apart. I have no idea why. I want to stop feeling that insecure, because it's definitely going to negatively affect her and nobody needs to be this level of neurotic.
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